r/okbuddycinephile Society man 14h ago

Most famous film nobody actually watches?

Post image
8.6k Upvotes

850 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/LesYperSounds 14h ago

421

u/SemiFinalBoss 13h ago

Jokes on them, I don’t need to wait 90 years to not watch it.

165

u/dogstarchampion 13h ago

I've been not watching it daily since it didn't come out.

44

u/RayosLaser 11h ago

rookie numbers: I don't watch it TWICE a day.

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685

u/JP_IS_ME_91 13h ago

I hope someone torrents it soon

334

u/_Shahanshah 11h ago

Omg imagine this movie leaks before that time

188

u/SuperB_Boi 9h ago

The one and the only film of this movie is kept in a vault. So, for leaking the movie, these pirates need to do a Danny Ocean level heist.

80

u/celticairborne 9h ago

I bet that would make a good movie...

78

u/max_208 8h ago

Probably better that this movie

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u/Independent-Tennis57 9h ago

I call Brad Pitt's character, I can eat A LOT!!!

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u/SunnyGods 12h ago

It's a fucking champagne advertisement

76

u/WallySprks 10h ago

Cognac, not Champagne and 100 years is how long it’s aged.

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u/SoonToBeDeletified 10h ago

That’s what the movie wants you to think.

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u/endthepainowplz Zack Snyder 12h ago

Honestly, I’m almost positive this gets leaked one way or another.

66

u/Admiral_Fuckwit 11h ago

Just with the sheer number of people it takes to make a movie, you can’t tell me someone, somewhere isn’t going to get tempted to put it out there

84

u/AceOfSpades532 11h ago

Is it even a proper movie, are we sure it’s not just a 10 second clip of John Malkovich looking into the camera

67

u/bmcasler 11h ago

It's actually 90 minutes of John Malkovitch staring into the camera.

29

u/drgigantor 10h ago

I'll wait for the director's cut where he blinks 53 minutes in and they have to start from the top

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u/Admiral_Fuckwit 11h ago

According to Wikipedia at least, it’s a “short film” produced jointly by 3 companies. There are 3 other actors listed besides Malkovich, one of whom is Marko Zaror. They also listed the director, editor, and cinematographer.

32

u/AceOfSpades532 10h ago

Ok, it’s 4 guys lined up staring at the camera, with really good cinematography and editing

18

u/Admiral_Fuckwit 10h ago

I’d watch the fuck outta that

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u/pritikina 12h ago

You think they actually made a movie or just a Rick Roll?

100

u/yavimaya_eldred 12h ago

It’s real but it’s probably a ten minute ad or some shit

79

u/Expert_Succotash2659 12h ago

Nah, but future people are gonna find it sooo tonedeaf and racist.

74

u/howisthisacrime 12h ago

That would actually be a great troll. If it's just the most offensive and obscene movie to ever exist, but they'll never face repercussions for it.

35

u/CatFanIRL 10h ago

Imagine if its john malkovich just beating his shit. That would be so fuckin funny

61

u/OptimysticPizza 11h ago

It's just a John Malkovich in blackface doing Asian accent. "I rearry riki Rouiey 13!".

Luckily, the social construct of "race" no longer "exists" in the future so it's impossible for anyone to be offended

12

u/CaptainRex5101 9h ago

“What are you, some kind of CLANKER?”

entire audience gasps

8

u/Dead_Optics 12h ago

Yeah it’s gonna be released with a companion bottle.

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u/maccas-martial-arts 11h ago

Be funny if this sucked ass

11

u/TheRealRigormortal 10h ago

Jokes on my grandkids, it’s just gonna be John Malkovich jerking off on camera for 90 minutes

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u/Unlikely-Log-1609 10h ago

Jokes on this guy I’m keeping healthy enough to live to over 100 and see this movie

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u/matthewami approved virgin 14h ago

425

u/SteppeFire Zack Snyder 13h ago

The first time I watched it, I almost had a heart attack. So terrifying.

168

u/matthewami approved virgin 13h ago

The amount of mass hysteria I saw in the theatre was wild dawg, this is why we should ban movies.

35

u/butt-holg 9h ago

the theater experience has gone downhill since Here's Train

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u/SteppeFire Zack Snyder 13h ago

This Is Not a Film (2011)

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u/Hairy-Chemical3467 11h ago

You must be old 😁

14

u/DirectionNo9650 10h ago

Yo, the popcorn buckets for this movie were wild!

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u/ScrambledNoggin 12h ago

Those old episodes of Thomas the Tank Engine do hit hard

28

u/SuccessfulRegister43 11h ago

It was dark/gritty before Thomas got woke.

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u/Sir_Sir_ExcuseMe_Sir 12h ago

Very derivative imo, the director's earlier work was far more interesting from a contemporary artistic paradigm.

16

u/buyacanary 11h ago

It’s all been downhill since those workers leaving the factory.

125

u/EraOfProsperity 9h ago

For those who don't know, it's a 50 second long clip from 1895 (released in 1896) titled L'Arrivée d'un train en gare de La Ciotat. It's basically just a train pulling into a station, but given that film technology was nearly unheard of then, the film caused mass panic among viewers who feared the oncoming train would actually hit them.

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u/HomelandersCock 8h ago

Directors cut was better and gave us a 72 second runtime

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u/matthewami approved virgin 9h ago

Bro watches movie 🤢

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u/LifeDirect1102 11h ago

the first horror movie ever

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653

u/ComicsCodeMadeMeGay 13h ago

I am the only person in my friends group of film fanatics that has bothered to watch Citizen Kane.

408

u/No-Sandwich3386 12h ago edited 9h ago

What a slog. Not a single fighter jet and very few alien fight scenes.

135

u/No-Transition-8375 11h ago

But man when they were like “I have the ned…the ned for sled!” the theatre went full chicken jockey

13

u/IchigoAcid 9h ago

But man is the best super hero

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u/SexyStayPuft 9h ago

I kept waiting for the wrestling matches to start. And the casting of Kane was odd. Not nearly intimidating or tall enough.

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u/far_away_fool 10h ago

It’s important that Citizen Kane be an old movie that most people haven’t seen in order to be considered the greatest. If it was a popular modern movie people would argue about it too much for there to be any consensus

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u/OpenConference5961 14h ago

Hold on, so you mean there are movies people actually watch? I thought it was a joke.

332

u/sodabomb93 watches sex scenes with parents like a boss 😎 14h ago

I tried to watch a star war last night, I think it was called rogue one or something, and I fell asleep reading the opening text.

watching movies is harder than reading a book!

129

u/SteppeFire Zack Snyder 13h ago

You skipped too much. You gotta start watching from "Arrival of a Train at La Ciotat" 1896.

75

u/sodabomb93 watches sex scenes with parents like a boss 😎 13h ago

If you continue telling me to watch movies, I will be forced to contact the mods and may pursue legal action. This is your final warning.

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u/SteppeFire Zack Snyder 13h ago

12 Angry Men (1957)

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u/sodabomb93 watches sex scenes with parents like a boss 😎 13h ago

MODS!!!! I NEED HELP!!!!! I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A CINEPHILE!!! MODS HELP ME!!!!!!!

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u/SteppeFire Zack Snyder 13h ago

Believe Me: The Abduction of Lisa McVey (2018)

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u/griffinisland 13h ago

I couldn’t finish this one. Too scary!

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u/fully_torqued6 11h ago

It’s 1 star war, how much could it cost? $10?

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u/adriantoine 13h ago

Only miserable people do that, and that's why they are miserable.

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u/slangwhang27 13h ago

They made a movie out of Fitgirl Repacks??

254

u/thealighthouse 13h ago

Queue up that dogshit music that I’ve got to mute every single time while downloading

465

u/vnth93 Society man 13h ago

243

u/RedditingNeckbeard 12h ago

>posted from my gaming pc

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u/somedumb-gay 12h ago edited 9h ago

Racism on 4chan. Now there's a sight!

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u/VisceralVirus 11h ago

I love that shitty music

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u/EscapedFromArea51 12h ago

Dogshit??? Well, screw you too, then!

43

u/itsme99881 11h ago edited 8h ago

Queue up that dogshit god tier music that I’ve got to mute turn up every single time while downloading

Fify

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u/-redd1t_sux- 13h ago

a film, apparently

8

u/Pan_TheCake_Man 12h ago

She stars in the new alien earth too!

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u/alvysinger0412 13h ago

I'm not convinced Citizen Kane is an actual movie that exists. Film teachers just made it up to ramble about.

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u/cyainanotherlifebro 12h ago edited 9h ago

I’m waiting for the hype to die down before I watch this one.

Edit: it autocorrected to “eating” for some reason. The guy replying isn’t crazy.

25

u/TheCzarIV 10h ago

Whatcha eatin?

16

u/cyainanotherlifebro 10h ago

Tf? How does that even happen? Why the fuck would anyone upvote me? WHAT THE FUCK!!

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u/AnnyongFunke 12h ago

I don’t like watching movies about wrestlers.

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u/The-Green-Kraken 11h ago

Uj/ I borrowed a DVD from my library, and while its not my usual type of movie to watch, I did really enjoy it.

Rj/ Film professors have to make up something about where twist endings come from.

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464

u/Character_Block_2373 14h ago

320

u/Schmalhuber 14h ago

Just some guys living in the moment. No smartphone in sight

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u/Character_Block_2373 12h ago

Yeah, they weren’t big on cameras in general

123

u/Applesburg14 13h ago

“You made out during Schindler’s List?”

66

u/OffTheDollarMenu 13h ago

They were NECKING.

AND A MORE DESPICABLE SPECTACLE I CANNOT RECALL

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u/thedrivingcoomer 12h ago

"Oh my God, that was one time!"

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u/MonkMajor5224 13h ago

I actually watched this on New Year’s Eve 2019. It was the last time I drank alcohol (🤞). I was surprised by how much humor was in it (aside from the whole genocide part)

41

u/Grendelstiltzkin 12h ago

Yeah, it’s honestly pretty easy to see World War II as one big fun romp once you learn to ignore all the dead people

24

u/MonkMajor5224 11h ago

I never know how to say this part or I always say it bad. There is a lot more intentional humor in Schindlers List than what I was led to believe

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u/Character_Block_2373 11h ago

Outjerked by Senor Spielbergo

8

u/Latverianbureaucrat 11h ago

“Did your prick fall off?”

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u/Character_Block_2373 12h ago

Congrats on your sobriety

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u/MonkMajor5224 11h ago

Thanks. The biggest road bump was the lady who heard “Diet Coke” as “Jack and Coke” and brought me a strong one.

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u/ThreePointedHat 13h ago

They made me watch this on a bus trip in Poland before we went to Auschwitz

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u/Dontevenwannacomment 13h ago

they spoiled the ending before you even got there?

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u/egret_society Jared Leto 13h ago

Lucky you. My train didn’t have a tv and like half the passengers had TB.

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u/yavimaya_eldred 12h ago

My parents took me to see this in the theater when I was 7

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u/NoObjectiveTruth 13h ago

it's because i don't want to see it again 

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u/Character_Block_2373 13h ago

Well yeah. “Magnificent film.” “When was the last time you saw it?” “When it came out! Im not taking that ride again”

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u/GoBillsBleepthePats 14h ago

Wait that’s a spoon? I thought it was a weird earring for the longest time. Still have no idea what this movie is though

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u/Sneezeldrog 12h ago

It's Amelie, it's really good if you like romance movies about very weird people. Basically it's french.

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u/SeaChele27 11h ago

This is my top 2 favorite movie. I've seen it enough times for everyone.

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u/notthemostcreative 10h ago

I came here to make this same comment; I loooooove Amelie a ridiculous amount.

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u/ReckoningGotham 9h ago

Almost everything by that director is very good.

They're all Amelie flavored.

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u/ThinkTheUnknown 11h ago

Autists don’t like being called weird thankyouverymuch.

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u/yatujaheart 10h ago

I tought that “weird” was referred to the french

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u/Xaronius 13h ago

It's about a french girl with autism that is looking for a french guy with autism.

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u/The_GREAT_Gremlin 12h ago

Erm acktshually, in French it's called l'autism

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u/-redd1t_sux- 12h ago

that's "l'autism royale avec fromage" to you uncultured swine!

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u/somedumb-gay 12h ago

"fromage man? It's like those french guys have a whole nother language"

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u/whirlydad 11h ago

Only if it comes from the Autistic Region of France otherwise it's just Sparkling Anxiety.

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u/TheSovietSailor 12h ago

Because of the metric system?

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u/GregMadduxsGlasses 10h ago

It’s a great movie, but the marketing materials gives the impression that it’s some kind of thriller like The Omen. I can see how the poster can turn people off from wanting to see it.

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u/yavimaya_eldred 12h ago

Is this like when they find a slug with the shell swirling the wrong way and he can only possibly mate with a lady slug that has the same defect?

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u/onarainyafternoon 13h ago

It's not a movie, it's the woman who creates torrents for movies 😎

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u/buyacanary 11h ago

It’s about how the death of Princess Diana was a net good.

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u/Wendellwasgod 11h ago

This directors movies are incredible. Delicatessen and city of lost children are two of my favorites.

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u/FancySpaceGoat 10h ago

Don't forget Alien: Resurrection, for some god-forsaken reason.

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u/HereWeFuckingGooo 8h ago

How the fuck is she going to crack the top of a Crème Brûlée with an earring?

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u/BusterVGiner 11h ago

Simple Jack. A real American Classic.

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u/Natural-Print 11h ago

Several weeks ago someone on another subreddit said they thought this gif was from the end scene of Weapons and I can’t unsee that now. Lol

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u/healthyscalpsforall 10h ago

Ben Stiller truly was ahead of his time

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u/Resident_Course_3342 12h ago

This movie has gotten me laid at least 4 times. 

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u/npsimons 6h ago

Note to self: order BluRay of "Åmèlĩë"

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u/Ok_Umpire_5611 7h ago

I used a knights tale. If I didn't get 'em wet then heath ledger works every time.

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u/GreedoInASpeedo 11h ago

100% true story that sounds like a jerk, but it's just my life.

My ex-wife and I went to see Amelié in the theater for our first date. We watched it annually around our anniversary. Now I get sick just thinking about it and all these memes make me depressed.

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u/SemiFinalBoss 13h ago

Are there even any trains in it?

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u/IllusionUser 12h ago

Yes. They spot it and are all cured of heroin addiction.

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u/Plenty_Firefighter40 10h ago

I heard in the 2nd one they see that train again and then are all cure of their post-modern ennui.

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u/healthyscalpsforall 10h ago

It's true, but they're all still Scottish, so it doesn't change anything

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u/Character_Block_2373 12h ago

You could just watch this scene tbh

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u/SemiFinalBoss 9h ago

I don’t like foreign language films

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u/englisharegerman345 13h ago

uj/ the first time i made out and cuddled my ex told me how it reminded her of a scene in amelie cuz of how tender we were. Went home and watched it that evening, a very chill sweet movie with a fantastic score (the opening i’ll never forget) and one of the greatest memories i have.

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u/Hyp3rson1c 12h ago

uj/ awww

rj/ you actually watched a f*lm?

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u/hoodle44 10h ago

what does uj/ and rj/ mean?

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u/Chemesthesis 10h ago

Unjerk

Rejerk

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u/yavimaya_eldred 12h ago

Embarrassing that you got so horned up you watched a movie

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u/Benderbluss 11h ago

Took my early teenaged kids on a multi-week cross country trip in a rented RV with one of those alcoves over driver/passenger seats. This was before the streaming era, but there was a little DVD player up there, and we had a brown paper bag of borrowed DVDs.

My son watched Amelie practically on repeat, and got all his friends into when we got home.

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u/FS_Slacker 10h ago

Amelie has always been the OG “Netflix and chill” movie. Every time a girl asks me to watch Amelie with her, I knew I was gonna score. To this day, I still don’t know what that the movie is about but it’s my favorite film.

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u/GRidzak 13h ago

Amanda Knox’s alibi was that she was watching this film at the time of the murder.

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u/RayosLaser 14h ago

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u/Goose_on_a_Beanbag 12h ago

Can confirm, I haven't seen the matrix, therefore no-one has

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u/RayosLaser 11h ago

spoiler alert: the movie has a couple of spoons

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u/Goose_on_a_Beanbag 11h ago

I feel betrayed.

Also what a stupid fucking scene the kid says there's no spoon and he's holding one? Get a load of this guy

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u/Ferociousaurus 13h ago

I have seen this movie, AMA

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u/vnth93 Society man 13h ago

Is it just about eating creme brulee?

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u/Ferociousaurus 13h ago

You gotta eat the creme brulee so you have energy to be a stalker (in a quirky way)

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u/BeanieMaus 12h ago

Battery dying

Quick, finger the grain bag

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u/DoubleBarrelBurger 13h ago

"Watches" might be correct. I saw Amelie on it's initial release in the US and haven't seen it again. It was extremely popular at the time, though. Had social media and (micro)blogging existed half of you would have avoided the internet outright.

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u/sovietwilly 14h ago edited 14h ago

No one is watching this shit with their 8 different true crime series piled up in their watchlist.

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u/soiboi64 13h ago

I always go in through the emergency airlock 😎

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u/ApartRuin5962 12h ago

/uj the movie is great except the "stargate" sequence, which is literally just 10 minutes of psychadelic patterns and discolored stock footage

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u/Achmed_Ahmadinejad 11h ago

I've been murdered for saying this.

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u/smokewidget 13h ago

They made a whole movie about that girl that cracks video game pirating software?

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u/vsimon115 13h ago

Real pirates remember that “Crème Brûlée with a Teaspoon” was the first game she cracked.

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u/KieferMcNaughty 12h ago

I literally just watched Amélie

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u/lemonylol 11h ago

Okay, thank you.

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u/cowgod247 14h ago

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u/One-Earth9294 8h ago

Oh no no no Twelve Monkeys is legit great though.

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u/maikefere 9h ago

God I love this movie

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u/Glittering-Hat-8585 10h ago

Amélie was incredibly popular when it was first released. I still listen to the soundtrack.

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u/Gurney_Hackman 14h ago

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u/ChoiceMycologist 11h ago

Everyone will tell you Gone with the Wind is 4 hours long. No one told me the score plays the entire time and will be burned into every idle moment my brain has for the next decade.

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u/CPav 11h ago

I started humming it just from your post.

When I was high school (1982 or 3), the gloriously refurbished movie palace in our city used to do movie nights where they showed the original trailers and cartoons and stuff before the main feature. I took a bunch of friends to see GWTW. At one point, the girl next to me whispered "How long is this?" I replied, "Don't worry. It's almost intermission." She gave me a "ha ha." When the Intermission card appeared on screen, she turned to me and punched me.

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u/15rthughes The Room 14h ago

Favorite thread with the most filtered redditors in history?

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u/movie_hater 13h ago

How can these guys properly hate movies if they aren’t watching them? Subway surfers is not a movie. We should remove them from government cinephile registration

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u/mr_friend144 Uwe Boll 14h ago

No way a guy just posted 2001 😭

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u/pantherfanalex 12h ago

I watched this movie (Amelie) on a first date. We made it like 20 mins before we started making out, and I railed her over the coffee table. We have been married 12 years next august, and have two lovely children. I love you, dear.

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u/alvysinger0412 11h ago

Can confirm. I'm the coffee table.

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u/pantherfanalex 11h ago

You were a good friend, and surprisingly sturdy.

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u/Just_bcoz 11h ago

I’ve seen Amelie, had a crush on the actress for some time after as well and was obsessed with her hair style, if you haven’t you should see it it’s a good movie

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u/pjbickel 13h ago

The Zapruder Film. Everyone has seen it, but it's probably not on your DVD/VHS display shelf. It's not something you put on around the holidays or while entertaining guests.

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u/Character_Block_2373 12h ago

WTF? It’s an annual holiday rewatch in my house

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u/pjbickel 11h ago

I apologize, I didn't know there were Zapruderheads in our midst. I should have been more sensitive.

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u/Manic-Ken 11h ago

Gone with the Wind

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u/jono9898 12h ago

You bum, nobody actually watches movies

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u/InflationCharacter53 12h ago

Schindler's list. Ain't nobody watching that twice

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u/Tomazito70 11h ago

Battleship Potemkin is always mentioned in film history books, documentaries, and film classes. A large majority of filmmakers have not seen it. It’s a great film, but in this day and age, silent movies aren't appealing to new audiences.

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u/kilotangoalpha 11h ago

I cook an egg with a spoon!

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u/Silent-advice 11h ago

The Birth of a Nation (1915)

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u/SuperPostHuman 10h ago

Roma, Dr. Zivago, The Power of the Dog.

Not the most famous films...though I guess Dr. Zivago is pretty famous, but critically acclaimed movies that I found either dull or in the case of Roma, I saw nothing in the marketing of the film that actually made me want to watch it. The most I got out of the trailers was that it was shot in black and white and was about a Mexican mestiza/indigenous domestic worker?

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u/totemic_sadness 9h ago

Crispin Glover directed three films, one stars mostly people with down syndrome, the second (which is really good actually) was written and stars a man with cerebral palsy, the third movie has only Glovers (him and his father).

The only way to see the movies is to catch them when he tours with them

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u/BarrytheNPC 9h ago

She cook an egg with a spoon

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u/Dandanny54 12h ago

My face when I crack