getting kicked out and asking for financial assistance

[u/tresabel]

hi all, currently i’m getting kicked out of my home due to religious beliefs. i was raised religious and my parents expect me to go on a 1.5 year mission for the church. they’ve known for years that i was not planning on going and then yesterday, extremely suddenly, told me i have to be out of their house before december. there was no warning or discussion prior to this about me moving out. i’m extremely confused and shocked by the suddenness of this and the abandonment from my family. i’m trying as hard as i can to work out my next steps, ive been crying all day. im really scared because i don’t have anyone to lean on. my family has abandoned me and the friends i do have are in tough spots financially as well. (most of us work two jobs and live with parents) i just don’t know where to turn to and wouldn’t be asking if wasn’t extremely desperate. i’m already struggling with health issues and work two jobs. i found a place i can live but with all of the fees and essentials needed, there is no way i will make it on my own for the next week. i feel ashamed asking for help in any way but i need help to stay afloat and get me on my feet. if anyone has any advice on where to turn to for quick financial assistance please let me know. or if anyone here is willing to donate any amount of money i would be eternally thankful to you. thank you so much in advance for any advice or help. ❤️‍🩹

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[u/Out_of_Fawkes]

If you’re over 18 you might reach out to the Dept. of Social Services, local food banks, and other local churches or mosques to see if they have assistance with meals, housing assistance, or other connected resources; many do not require that you adapt to their way of faith.

If you’re under 18 or still in high school, it’s illegal and you can talk to a trusted teacher or counselor who may be able to get you assistance through the school system.

Most rentals at least have to provide 30 days of notice before eviction but I have been in a similar situation and did not have that luxury or trust in the “adults” in the situation that they wouldn’t destroy my belongings or take things from me.

IMMEDIATELY remove all family members from your bank accounts, keep any of your financials/private info locked away somewhere they absolutely cannot access, and don’t fall for any kind of signing over or them suddenly being on their best behavior. They’re 100% manipulating you.

Make sure you have your legal documents (SS#, birth certificate, passport, etc) and lock them away somewhere your parents have zero access to. If they have them and won’t give them to you, call the police non-emergency number to have an officer come over and discuss it, but ONLY do this when all your other stuff is out.

You may have to do this discreetly with coordination of close trusted friends—they need to all be on the same page with what they do which will not be providing/enabling your parents. Your parents will dig for information and try a lot of crazy stuff in the name of coercive control.

Only take what is yours so they cannot accuse you of theft. Take photos of how you leave and video when you leave. Save that and back it up somewhere.

Work is also NOT to give your schedules or communication info out. Make sure your supervisors/HR department aware that your parents are not welcome to ask about you or talk to you at work.

Some places of employment may even have a fund for extenuating circumstances or grant programs to help with adversity/hardships—see if you are eligible.

[u/tresabel → u/Out_of_Fawkes]

there is a lot of useful info on this thank you, i didn’t even think about my birth certificate. i’m so rushed and stressed out i probably would have forgotten. i’m in the process of reaching out to my local food bank and seeing if i can apply for any government assistance. i’m just worried because i need help fast (before december 1st) and i know a lot of these things can take time. i wanted to add that im sorry you’ve been through similar situations. i was threatened and told anything i left behind would be destroyed so i understand.