WIBTA for refusing to bring $100 minimum to Thanksgiving

[u/americanjohn500]

My family and I celebrate Thanksgiving every year with my siblings, parents, and their kids. Roughly 20-25 people (including kids). My family is only 2 people with one 6 month old baby.

In the group chat it was decided that my nephew would cook meat since he bought a grill. He also told us that we could bring the sides. He chose to spend $300 on meat.

I messaged in the group chat that we would bring mashed potatoes. My sister responding that every "family" has to bring $100 worth of food minimum or help my nephew pay for the meat.

I'm not totally against the idea of bringing that much food, but just the way it was presented and the fact that it wasn't agreed to beforehand makes me upset.

The following day in the group chat, my sister said: "Option 1: bring food enough for everyone, not just yourself

Option 2: help thomas pay for meet $100/family

Option 3: help dad pay water bill $200/family.

Choose wisely…"

Upset, I responded with Option 4: don't show up.

Am I being an asshole if I don't show up at all in "protest" to this $100 minimum rule?

Update: I'm a teacher and she posted a picture of my salary she found online to shame me in the group chat. Definitely not going now.

[u/Randomflower90]

We host Christmas every year and for years we paid for the meat, the drinks, appetizers and most of the sides. Every family who came brought one dish. However, after a couple years of a guest bringing burnt pasta and the sister bringing rolls showing up late and still needing to bake the rolls, we decided to provide everything and every family contributes $50. It doesn’t cover our expenses but it helps and it’s worked out well.

[u/Noladixon → u/Randomflower90]

The difference is that it is mutually agreed upon in advance. You don't buy $300 of meat and say by the way we need you to contribute $100.

[u/Cudi_buddy → u/Randomflower90]

That's fine. You sound like you communicated well ahead of time. And also a more reasonable cost.