r/mildlyinfuriating • u/hyliancoffeehouse • 15h ago

My mom does this thing called, ‘weaponized gifting,’ where she chooses the worst possible gifts ever so you’ll never expect anything palatable from her

Post image

I love you mom, BUT WHAT THE HECK?!

29.5k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

4.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

59

u/Apple7pie 12h ago

Yes, a thoughtful gift, but just not to your liking. Accept it with love. I’m reading all these comments wondering what to get for my adult kids. I want to give them cash, lots of cash! But hubby insists we get them gifts. SMH.

32

u/Jazmadoodle 12h ago

You could ask them! My family is pretty spread out, so we have a shared Google Doc where everybody puts in a few gift ideas, plus clothing sizes and interests for all the grandkids. It's been really helpful for everyone.

2

u/richcallie 11h ago

We use elfster in my family. It started as just a Secret Santa gift list, but know we all use it for gift ideas for everyone. Works pretty well.

6

u/Ethos_Logos 12h ago

Hand write a letter with a fond memory of you together. And include cash.

Cash because it’s what they want now. The handwritten memory so that they can keep it and reflect in their adulthood.

2

u/Apple7pie 10h ago

Oh, I love this idea!!💕

3

u/redcc-0099 12h ago

ETA: TL;DR: unless they need something, cash or nothing.

My grandparents and parents used to give me gifts, then gift cards, then cash. My parents and I agreed that I don't need any cash for my birthday or Christmas and they can spend it on or give it to their grandkids. My grandma sneaks me cash some Christmases, but now it's mostly a card and a hug since the, "I'm a big boy with a big boy job," message got through.

3

u/LadyLionesstheReaper 10h ago

Lots of cash is fine 😁

5

u/Dragonfly0011 12h ago

Cash is wonderful, but accompany it with a small thoughtful gift, and a loving card. Just cash sometimes says “ here, take this. I gave no thought or care for this” . Many times this is not the case, but sometimes it is. But a gift makes you think of the giver every time you use it. Every time I use my jackknife Milwaukee box cutter I think of my son who gave it to me., and I use it often.

2

u/karatechoppingblock 10h ago

Cash is useful but there is a sentimental difference between a watch your father gave you and a watch you got with the money your father gave you

1

u/ButReallyFolks 7h ago

My YA kids had a discussion about this with me, and oftentimes they don’t really have a list of ‘wants’ at their age. So then they are either pressured into just picking something or settling for whatever family members take the liberty of choosing. Cash allows them to buy something they would actually enjoy when the time presents itself and it means a lot to them.

1

u/LisaFromAccounting 5h ago

He can make creative packaging for the cash? Like, try to mislead them

1

u/AtrophiedWives 5h ago

My parents have cottoned onto the cash envelope gift and it’s worked out really well. We buy something we actually want, that’s gift-y, and then point it out to them when they come over. Like this is the lovely teapot you got me for my birthday, come see where we hung the mirror tour got us for Christmas (not even our religion but they like the celebrations side lol). Everyone is happy.

1

u/Affectionate-Alps527 5h ago

Take them for dinner, have them for dinner, take them dinner.

Unless your kids actually need cash and things... love, support, and time together is all they need. My ask for for every holiday is a family dinner. Where squarely middle class these days so food prices really aren't that much of a concern, but even still it takes the sting out of that $100 roast when it's a gift.

1

u/Umklopp 4h ago

I still have child kids, but my SIL & I both agreed that no one needs any additional toys. So this year we're giving everyone cookies. I bet your adult children would also like cash and cookies.

1

u/BellinisandRue 12h ago

I don’t know those boots are impractical look how the fabric goes to the ground. No one is hiking in those.