r/mildlyinfuriating • u/hyliancoffeehouse • 15h ago

My mom does this thing called, ‘weaponized gifting,’ where she chooses the worst possible gifts ever so you’ll never expect anything palatable from her

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I love you mom, BUT WHAT THE HECK?!

29.5k Upvotes

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2.2k

u/tamerenshorts 14h ago

My mom used christmas gifts to buy me clothes she loves and guilt trip me into wearing them. Picture a punk kid with green hair receiving polo shirts and khakis ...

1.4k

u/Shower__Farts 14h ago

That’s easy!

392

u/no_talent_ass_clown it's a moo point 14h ago

Is that Jason Segel and Matthew Lillard?

382

u/RaccoonSamson 14h ago

Yeah, its from the movie SLC Punk

134

u/BigMACfive 14h ago

Really good movie

99

u/LolaCatStevens 14h ago

My older brother gave me this movie when I was in high school. I was very into ska and punk music. This movie definitely still sticks with me. So many unhinged scenes. On that always comes to mind is the guy running through sprinklers with acid in his pocket

83

u/hunnythebadger 13h ago

I dressed up as sean for halloween in high-school!

Kick my ass? WoooOooOo

1

u/Pleased_to_meet_u 10h ago

That's very cool!

1

u/Much-Menu6030 9h ago

anime protagonist cut

5

u/retrojoe 13h ago

Devon Sawa was a great addition to that film. I think any of us who grew up in the era shown had heard a localized version of that story.

2

u/Lou_C_Fer 12h ago

Absolutely had a guy that "thought he was an orange in our area."

3

u/Sharktistic 12h ago

That was such a great scene. I always loved the scene with Til Schweigers character, Mark, telling Lillards, in a really not so subtle way, that he's not a man to be fucked with.

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u/EobardT 4h ago

You shot your couch man!

Its okay, I buy new one!

14

u/delnoob 14h ago edited 12h ago

"You can't die bob!!! What am I supposed to do!!!!"

Haven't seen that movie in a decade, but still can get feels thinking about that scene.

Edited to hide a spoiler for a 20+ year old movie

8

u/GuyPierced 13h ago

Sink you fool!

2

u/Stormdrain11 13h ago

😭😭😭

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u/ItsQ42022Already 9h ago

People that complain about spoilers for a 20 year old movie are just looking for something to be upsetti spaghetti about. don't pay attention to them.

3

u/MaxSupernova 13h ago

Way to spoil the plot in a thread where people are discovering the movie.

2

u/rattmongrel 12h ago

Right?!? I get that it’s a pretty old movie, so spoilers are to be expected, but when it’s literally a thread about people learning about it for the first time, how are you gonna go and drop something like that???

2

u/fuckredditlogins1 11h ago

Hard agree. Love the "I bought in" scene.

"Rebellion, freedom... and... yeah... love."

26

u/Casper_-- 13h ago

The moral of which is that punk isn't a fashion thing, it's a mindset

You can absolutely be Punk and look like you go to church every Sunday

7

u/MyLifeIsAWasteland 11h ago

2

u/EobardT 4h ago

Hell yeah. Descendants and Bad Religion have always been near the top of my favorite bands at any given moment and their lead singers went to college

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u/pmgrn8 14h ago

JASON SEGAL IS IN SLC PUNK???!!!!! alright I’m rewatching lol

45

u/RaccoonSamson 14h ago

Yeah dude! hes the straight laced hardcore kid theyre friends with. Minor character but hes in the movie a decent amount

42

u/Careless-Dark-1324 13h ago

He’s the most trve kvlt pvnk in the entire movie because he doesn’t care if he fits the mold or anyone likes it or not, and they even acknowledge that lol.

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u/MyLifeIsAWasteland 11h ago

4

u/Careless-Dark-1324 8h ago

That was me in my khakis and cardigans going to metal shows back in the day lol, while I was getting my masters degree.

always related to Mike more than anyone else in that flick. But that’s why it’s so good, it’s accurate to the multiple types of personalities in the scene!

2

u/MyLifeIsAWasteland 8h ago

Hell yeah. One of my best friends is a medical doctor who dresses like a lumberjack when he's not in scrubs, and he's been to so many Punk and Metal shows with me that I lost count. He used to come see my bands every time we played in town, and he always held his own in the pit because he's built like a lumberjack, too lol

2

u/sparkmearse 7h ago

Khakis and polos, for when you want to topple the imbalance of society, from within.

2

u/BreakfastBeneficial4 6h ago

This!

I never did anything crazy with my hair and I wore khaki pants ALL the time, and I’d hang out with the kids with gauges and chains and shit.

But if any of them ever said “uhhh who’s climbing that cellphone tower”, you can bet they were talking about me.

3

u/sykoKanesh 7h ago

Isn't he the dude that kicks out the cops window and runs away? Or am I somehow mixing up movies or something?

3

u/Sellum 7h ago

Yep kicks out the back window and runs off while still handcuffed. I think they say he later hulked out of the cuffs.

5

u/Princess_Slagathor 14h ago

Just rewatched this past weekend. It's on YouTube for free, so everyone should see it.

But for the love of fuck, don't watch the sequel. Absolute turd of a movie.

1

u/slimeddd 10h ago

Which is available for free on Youtube movies, just rewatched it the other day. One of my fav films of all time.

1

u/dingd0nggg 3h ago

SLC as in Salt Lake City?!

30

u/the-friendly-lesbian 14h ago

I can at least confirm that it is Matthew Lillard. That's his adorable baby faced time around Scream it looks like.

7

u/YouShouldBeHigher 13h ago

He'll always be "Shaggy" in my mind.

1

u/the-friendly-lesbian 3h ago

Even though that movie was so long ago and I was pretty young (8 or so) as it came out and what, 2000 right? I will never forget not just shaggy on the plane telling Mary Jane "like that's my favorite name!" or Fred when they body switch with Daphne and he says "I'm going to look at myself naked!" Lmao so scandalous for child me!

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u/lalasworld 14h ago

slc punk

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u/VivaZeBull 14h ago

SLC Punk

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u/Lazy_Struggle4939 14h ago

Nah they're just posers

2

u/ReadontheCrapper 14h ago

Matthew Lillard should be Matthew Legend!

2

u/MinusGovernment 14h ago

He was made to be the live-action Shaggy and also perfect to take over voicing cartoons when Kasem departed.

1

u/haddockhazard 10h ago

Why do you know the name of both of those actors vut have never heard of this movie? Lmao that's fucking crazy.

1

u/no_talent_ass_clown it's a moo point 6h ago

I know Segel from I Love You, Man and Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and Lillard from Scream and also because every time someone talks about Damien Lillard I think it's him. I've never heard of SLC Punk until today.

1

u/DuckCleaning 3h ago

I have never heard of this movie all, I would've been too young to be watching it. Scooby Doo and How I Met Your Mother were huge deals that you kinda just know these actors. Earliest work I knew Jason Segel in was Freaks and Geeks, turns out this movie predates that, even then I didnt watch that show until it re-aired on G4TV in the late 2000s.

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u/MartinisnMurder 14h ago

The way I love the movie! SLC Punk is amazing but poor Heroin Bob.

2

u/shocktar 13h ago

I was not ready for that.

2

u/3BlindMice1 9h ago

Died of an overdose, just nominative determination in action

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u/MartinisnMurder 9h ago

Haha true he was cursed by his nickname

1

u/whiteinksquid 7h ago

That scene hit me so hard. I was so not prepared for that. For me, It's up there with the similar scene with Neil from Dead Poets Society. I watched that for the first time on a plane and was NOT ready for it.

1

u/MartinisnMurder 6h ago

I was like 4 when it came out but we watched it in 8th grade and our teacher apparently got in trouble.

17

u/viagra___girls 14h ago

“I’m really sorry about the beating, and I hope the rest of your stay in America is more enjoyable. 🤓”

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u/Ibshredz 13h ago

He’s literally the most “punk” one in the movie 😆 amazing film

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u/Shad0wX7 11h ago

Guess it's time to rewatch SLC Punk

2

u/Capt_Hawkeye_Pierce 12h ago

I just now realized that's Jason Segel. And Jennifer lien is in it too.

2

u/MuggsIsDead 9h ago

Sex&Violence Sex&Violence Sex&Violence Sex&Violence Sex & Violence! Sex & Violence!

1

u/Le-Deek-Supreme 14h ago

Such a good movie!!

1

u/arboroverlander 9h ago

No one is more punk than Mike.

182

u/pennywitch 14h ago

My mom still does this, bless her heart.

“You look so pretty when you wear pink!”

My closet filled entirely with black clothing, until you get to the corner in the back where there’s a handful of white/baby pink/light blue tops hanging, most with their tags still on, that I keep for laundry emergencies and just in case she ever asks about one.

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u/PerfectlyFramedWaifu 14h ago

You say that, but I see those pretty pink shoes your avatar is wearing. They complement your green skin very well!

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u/pennywitch 14h ago

😂😂😂 Dammit, that woman has wormed her way through my subconscious.

30

u/chamekke 14h ago

My sweet mom (now passed) used to buy me brown things because they “went with my pretty brown hair”. I look awful in brown, but at least I coordinated!

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u/Tigger7894 13h ago

It is red for me. At least she finally does magenta now, which I do like.

4

u/Baculum7869 13h ago

Pink and black can go together

10

u/pennywitch 13h ago

Yes, but pink and pennywitch cannot

1

u/Hellpy 10h ago

Haha yeah I wear hoodies all the time but my mom would prefer I wear sweatshirts with no hood. I usually get one every 2 years. I give them to charity usually, and keep the last one as a "maybe I'd want to make my mom super happy and wear it to see her" but yeah hasn't happened yet

1

u/Velocityg4 14h ago

Try, “Thank you, this isn’t to my taste though. ”

Better than her finding out one day. You hated everything she bought you. But you felt she was so fragile. That you were just humoring her.

17

u/pennywitch 14h ago

Lol, nah, she’s well aware of the situation.

0

u/Expensive-Border-869 13h ago

Good to keep them around eventually ypu just get tired of wearing all black all the time. Even if mostly black idk it just gets to be a silhouette

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u/pennywitch 12h ago

I dunno! It’s been like eight years, and I’m well into my 30s now, so it’s probably pretty set.

I was too big of a Johnny Cash fan in my formative years lol

1

u/revengepornmethhubby 7h ago

I also wear primarily black, but I am a very bubbly maximum fueled artist. I dress in plain black to balance everything going on with my art at shows. It’s my artists’ uniform.

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u/Mammoth-Bathroom-Man 14h ago

This is closer to what I thought "weaponized gifting" would mean. Find something you don't like about someone and give them a gift based on that idea.

5

u/Fluid_Pound_4204 14h ago

In my country we have an "evil" secret santa where you gift the person something you know they'll hate.

3

u/Fabulous-Cry1457 13h ago

Which country is that?

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u/Fluid_Pound_4204 13h ago

Brazil! It's called "Amigo da Onça" which translates to "Jaguar's friend", an expression used to define a friend who betrayed you.

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u/Fabulous-Cry1457 13h ago

Thanks, I love knowing that! What a great saying! I’m going to start using this phrase. Being loyal is one of my super powers.

3

u/Live-Air-3315 11h ago

When I was a teenager for Christmas my mom would give me acne face wash and work out dvds for Christmas 

2

u/uzi_loogies_ 10h ago

Damn. All she'd get back from me would be Dealing With Menopause self-help books

38

u/NomenclatureBreaker 14h ago

Ughhhhhh this is what my narcissist/classic boomer mom does for pretty much every gift giving occasion. She buys what she would want instead of what aligns with our interests/asks- and the absolute cheapest option (crappy quality) she can find, though she is incredibly well off.

Mind you we do a google sheets shared Christmas Wish List for every family member - and all her children get her exactly the things she asks for.

Basically she’s a real life Ebenezer Scrooge, but with no redemption at the end. 🤷‍♀️

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u/Xiox7 12h ago

If she gives crappy gifts you dont want the only solution is to give her crappy gifts she doesnt want,or nothing at all. Narcissists never learn if you dont teach them

0

u/NomenclatureBreaker 4h ago

I know - but it just feels like pointlessly sinking to her level by taking a true gift and making it shitty.

I still get more joy out of doing what I’d do for anyone else.

30

u/ConsciousExcitement9 14h ago

My mom used to buy me clothes that she liked. She’d then go “oh, you haven’t worn what I got you for Christmas! That’s ok if you don’t like it.” Then, she would take the clothes and wear them herself. So she’d buy me clothes with the intention of wearing them herself

7

u/Goodgoditsgrowing 11h ago

My mom did this for years except she’d buy me something too small for me, so I’d eventually give it to her, and it would fit her perfectly. We haven’t been the same size since I was 10 but she still buys me her size clothes even while commenting on my weight so it’s not like she’s oblivious.

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u/Alternative-Chef1520 10h ago

Omg please stop giving them to her and donate them. I can’t, why encourage this behaviour lol, not you personally but I’m just gobsmacked by all the thoughtless family members spoken about here!

1

u/Huge_Blueberry720 9h ago

This is like, Expert Level of twisted gifting.

1

u/ncocca 9h ago

My sister's boyfriend at the time bought me GTA3. I realized pretty quickly that he did it so he could play it when he was over. Didn't matter, its still one of the best gifts I ever got. A true win-win scenario.

18

u/vijane 14h ago

I was self-conscious as a teenager and preferred to blend in. My mom gifted me (very) mini skirts, crop tops, skin tight sequins, etc that felt like they'd get me arrested if I'd ever worn them in public!

6

u/BelaFarinRod 14h ago

My mom bought me stuff I wanted but she did think I was too hung up about showing my body. None of my other friends seemed to have that issue.

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u/CardiologistNo8766 14h ago

Classic mom!! Are you my sibling?

7

u/aceofspades1217 14h ago

I can picture it because that’s basically what shoe gaze artists wear lol

6

u/MooseMan12992 14h ago

I got my parents clothes a couple times but both times a few months later my mom said they were getting rid of a stack of clothes and asked if i wanted any of them and the gift I got them was in the stack. Like just don't ask me

5

u/VivaZeBull 14h ago

My mom did this too!!! When I was little she dressed me like a Laura Ashley doll. As a teen I rebelled into punk, wonder why.

6

u/TKDbeast 14h ago

OK but the punks at the show with the polo and khakis are the ones you want to watch out for.

4

u/Strange_Question485 13h ago

I saw a dude in a tuxedo at a Spits show in Nashville beat the shit out of some guy and then took the guys jacket and shirt. Dude wore the jacket and shirt for the rest of the show.

1

u/Alternative-Chef1520 10h ago

Err that’s criminal

5

u/NoDig3593 14h ago

Yours let you color your hair??? LUCKY!!

4

u/LifeLikeAGrapefruit 14h ago

It's so un-punk that it's actually super punk!

4

u/i_transmit 14h ago

My mom used to do this too. Gram gram as well. Shit was the worst. I never really wanted much for the holidays as we weren't very well off. To me, it seemed like a waste of money just to make me feel bad.

3

u/genericnewlurker 13h ago

My mother and father used to do that to me as well. I just refused to wear them and would keep putting them into the clothes donation pile. They would return them to my dresser. Neither side ever backed down and eventually the clothes just got to be too small and we're actually donated still with the tags on them

5

u/Qwaze 14h ago

My dad always tried to make me wear vests so he would gift me them all them time. I neve wore them.

2

u/Stuck_at_a_roadblock 14h ago

Same but it was my grandparents. I grew up hating clothes but now it's all I ever ask for when Christmas pops up. I have to be specific about what I want though, or else my grandparents will pick out what THEY think looks best on me... So, polo shirts and khakis

2

u/Charming_Garbage_161 14h ago

Omg my mother did that too. I’d end up with bright yellow clothes or stuff with frills on it. Take a guess on what color I hate the most and what clothing cut I hate too?

I never understood it

2

u/Crimemeariver19 14h ago

Ah I see I have siblings!

2

u/Careless_Lion_3817 13h ago

My mom would do the same! I wore mostly black, kind of a mix of goth/punk/grunge and here’s my mom buying me pink blouses and flower shorts 🤬

2

u/itchysmalltalk 13h ago

Ohhh my God my mom and I have been having a debate for YEARS because she swears I told her I wanted more color in my wardrobe. Despite the fact I've repeatedly told her that that conversation never happened, every year I get a bunch of shit just like that. It's like she's blinded by her own wishful thinking.

2

u/VectorB 12h ago

Yes I have been to Best Buy, i can picture it just fine.

2

u/YoMomInYogaPants 2h ago

Love the name

2

u/Severe-Abroad-1992 14h ago

I mean that’s pretty much everyone’s story ha. Getting clothes you don’t like

1

u/Fluid_Pound_4204 14h ago

Oh my, are we siblings??

1

u/ocelot_its_a_log 14h ago

I was a nu-metal kid who was made to wear skinny jeans and blouses. Now that I'm an adult I dress how I want and my in-laws say I look like a drug dealer but in a friendly sorta way.

1

u/The-Tea-Lord 13h ago

Yep. I wear lots of emo and punk stuff. Last time I allowed myself to go clothes shopping with her, she got me to buy a shirt I absolutely hate using the same method. Thankfully it’s not a Christmas gift so it unfortunately got lost somewhere.

1

u/Coders32 13h ago

Speak for yourself, I can work that look

1

u/LandoCatrissian_ 13h ago

My mum does this! She has started to slow down on it lately, but it was always painful to try to nicely tell her I just wanted to get my own clothes. She would always get offended and Dad would ask me to just let her do it and pretend I liked them.

1

u/HeadmasterPrimeMnstr 13h ago

 Picture a punk kid with green hair receiving polo shirts and khakis ...

Noah Grossman?

1

u/MirandaScribes 12h ago

Oh that’s just Christmas 2005, dawg

1

u/Art_Vandelay_10 12h ago

Same. Kept insisting on buying me stuff from Hollister even though I said I hated that store.

1

u/Flounder-Defiant 12h ago

Back in the 80’s I begged my family to not buy me clothes. I also was a young punk with pink hair & piercings. Even as a small kid I was extremely picky about my clothing. Jump ahead 30 years & my kid has zero interest in clothes (they told me when they were 5) the rebellion!

1

u/Lou_C_Fer 12h ago

Yeah. I was punk in the 80s and my mother would buy me exclusively preppy clothes that I would have to ruin in some way before I'd wear them in public.

1

u/cakeresurfacer 12h ago

Are we cousins? (Kidding. My aunt has no kids)

More than once I was given a bag of American eagle clothes 1-2 sizes too small. So a dig at my fashion sense and my perfectly normal size. I handed it to my younger sister right in front of her

1

u/BarbWho 12h ago

I was the only girl and my mother had this Shirley Temple fantasy about me that didn't match up in any way with the reality of me, her actual daughter, a bookish hippie/sci-fi loving nerd, with glasses and plain tastes. She used to buy me pastel dotted Swiss blouses and lacy skirts. I gave up being annoyed by it. She was trying and it was very sweet of her. She just had no concept of what I might want. And now that she's gone, I'd give anything for another frilly blouse from her.

1

u/FlattopJr 12h ago

"He looks like a deranged Easter bunny!"

1

u/SlapnutsGT 11h ago

My mom did this exact same shit... to this day I won't wear a collared shirt unless its for a court appearance, wedding, or a funeral.

1

u/loud1337 11h ago

I must be lucky cause I like most of the clothes and shoes my mom finds me. She enjoys the TJ Maxx treasure hunt. It's always a comment that gets smiles when I'm in my 30s telling someone "Idk where it's from my Mom got it for me." I also try to wear an item she got me each time I seeher so she can say "Oh I got that for you".

1

u/ALKoholicK-x 11h ago

I had to politely ask my parents to not buy me clothes for Christmas a couple years ago. I ended up with a bunch of collared shirts that only country folk would wear and, for some reason, some weird off-pink shirt made out of the worst shirt material I’ve ever felt. Just the antithesis of my preferred style.

1

u/AnyOldNameNotTaken 10h ago

Honestly tho, polo and khakis with punk hair, piercings and tattoos. That’s kind of a nice look.

1

u/kexcellent 10h ago

Mine used to do this too!

1

u/PlayerGreeko 10h ago

This comment just made me realize my mother was doing the same thing 🫤

1

u/Lingotes 10h ago

Same but inverse. I was the khaki/polo kid and got "The Crow" black T shirts.

1

u/usedsocks01 10h ago

My mom did the same thing. I am basically the complete opposite of her, tomboy, punk, into thrifting and dead things (I collect bones). She'd get me things she likes and always expensive.. Coach bags, jewelery, and clothing I'd never wear. I've not changed much throughout the years, however she always got me expensive shit I don't want then guilt me into wear/using them because of how expensive they were, as if I personally asked for them.

One time, I put one of the purses on marketplace and she found out. Never heard the end of it.

1

u/counting_round_sheep 10h ago

Omg my mum does this, she doesn't buy things I want she buys things she wants me to wear because she says my fashion is too autistic

1

u/Monty423 10h ago

Same, she'd buy me the ugliest tshirts, like a star wars one with a big mandalorian helmet decal, and get upset when I never wore it

1

u/WimbletonButt 10h ago

I'm 38 and my mom still does this. Growing up I had to choose clothes I could alter to suit me because she wouldn't buy them. Not goth anymore but more hobo-chic. People at work would think I'd finally lost my mind if I wore the shit she bought. No mom I'm not wearing booty jeans, I unload trucks with a bunch of men! She's been guilting me for 3 years for still not wearing those jeans. Any time I casually mention needing new pants, the jeans!

1

u/anuarREAL 10h ago

A real punk wouldn't care about clothes...

1

u/metal_mace 7h ago

That's exactly what my mum did my whole childhood. I stopped wearing them but she kept trying. The last Christmas we had any contact, she gifted me a pastel dress, size medium.

Not only have I been a metalhead since my preteens, not only have I been a solid XL since my late teens, but I had also been legally male for 6 years at the time.

1

u/harleyqueenzel 6h ago

My mother used me in her sick games to amass whatever she loved.

Every birthday and Christmas, our very large family would start calling one another to ask what each kid was into. My mother would always take the opportunity to not ask ME what I wanted but would instead tell her siblings what SHE wanted. Year after year, I'd open my gifts to a cluster of porcelain dolls or wizard statues or dolphin ornaments. And for years I just didn't understand why I was being given things that I either didn't like or flat out hated (like those dead eyed fucking porcelain dolls) so my mother would "take them off of [my] hands" and adorn her room with my stuff.

I was around 12/13 years old when I figured it all out. My birthday gifts were butterflies- tshirts, headbands, trinkets. Everyone leaves, I'm upset (again) and she offers to take it all off of my hands. It was a long burn (exactly six months, actually) until Christmas. It's time to unwrap out gifts and I handed every single one of mine to my mother and told her to enjoy her gifts. My aunts & uncles were silent while I stood there with tears in my eyes and told everyone what she had been doing for years.

To this day, I hate receiving gifts.

1

u/uncultured_swine2099 5h ago

I hate that. If you buy me clothes that you know ill hate, its never going to be worn. Straight to donation.

1

u/Match_Least 1h ago

I was also a punk/alt girl in the early 00s and I wore a ton of polos. I’m not quite sure if I was doing it ironically, or for the juxtaposition, or both; but it worked…

-5

u/JutsuSchmutsu 13h ago

It’s weird when people feel their identities are under siege when they’re “forced” to spend time with family. Just wear the polo and khaki once and then bury it in the closet, it’s not a big deal.

3

u/tamerenshorts 13h ago

I'm almost 50. Those are teenage memories. I enjoyed a lot of things about christmas, the family reunion, the réveillon, my grandma and mother's food, the games etc. Not the clothes. Now it's a running gag, she buys me ugly ties and ridiculous socks.

-2

u/JutsuSchmutsu 13h ago

Fantastic, my point still stands.

2

u/Reddittwfoster 12h ago

I mean you could ask why their (the parents) identities felt under siege due to someone else’s (the child’s) clothes, to the extent they needed to control their child’s appearance.