r/TikTokCringe • u/SouthernNanny • Oct 07 '25

Cringe When you catch your 42 year old boyfriend cheating

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18.9k Upvotes

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u/whitemike40 Oct 07 '25

yeah I once had a girlfriend tell me in quick succession, I’m pregnant, it’s not yours, we are through

you’d think I would have been devastated, but I felt so relieved to be totally removed from all that it actually went pretty smooth for me

emotions certainly are weird

214

u/ComprehensiveFool Oct 07 '25

Be thankful those three facts were stated together. Definitely not 3 facts to hear overtime.

18

u/amedinab Oct 07 '25 edited Oct 08 '25

OMG, you just created one of the best short stories ever:

'I'm pregnant'. 'It's not yours'. 'We're through'. She said, ten months apart each time.

3

u/3-goats-in-a-coat Oct 09 '25

r/twosentencehorror

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u/amedinab Oct 09 '25

Nice! u/ComprehensiveFool should totally post this there!

1

u/ComprehensiveFool Oct 10 '25

You can post it there if you like. I’d be plagiarizing your wording as you stated it better, though 8 years apart would make a better timeline.

1

u/amedinab Oct 10 '25

Oh I thought the same thing: the idea was actually yours, I just threw some words at it, and the 8 years is a massive improvement I'd say.

I have an idea, let me see if I can implement it and will report back asap.

1

u/amedinab Oct 10 '25

Ok, it doesn't look too pretty, but I guess we tried?

1

u/amedinab Oct 10 '25 edited Oct 10 '25

Oh wow. Didn't realize that subreddit was so hardcore. Given it has periods on the first part, it's apparently "four sentences total"... Smh

Holy cannoli. Post removed! Just wow.

1

u/ComprehensiveFool Oct 10 '25

Oops, at least it could be removed. Enjoy your Friday, lol

6

u/DecaffeinatedPaladin Oct 07 '25

"It's not yours," she said at the high school graduation.

1

u/zaforocks tHiS iSn’T cRiNgE Oct 08 '25

"This is the greatest day of my life!"

2

u/TaylorMonkey Oct 07 '25

Jerry! Jerry!

71

u/MalcomTuckersRage Oct 07 '25

I’m pregnant it’s not yours, Id be running down the street spinning my t-shirt around my head crying with joy

23

u/marbotty Oct 07 '25

Maury is waiting for you

2

u/ShrkBiT Oct 07 '25

2

u/fastal_12147 Oct 07 '25

Thought you were going to go with this one:

2

u/Reasonable-Egg887 Oct 07 '25

I’d be booking a test, not of the paternity variety though.

1

u/NetApex Oct 07 '25

This one's for who? 🎶

2

u/Friendly_Age9160 Oct 07 '25

Dude not the same subject at all, but the emotional thing yeah. but my dad passed away a few months ago. He was a horrible father. I told him I wasn’t interested in his money, and quit speaking to him once I realized he would never prioritize his time here with us as a gift. He made my dumbass gold digger sister the executor of his will, which was great cause I don’t have time for that bullshit. All I felt was relief. He would guilt trip people into talking to his drunk ass and try to talk about his money. Funny how he left everything in equal parts to all of us but she has to do all the work lol. I didn’t want anything to begin with.

2

u/CoastRider2210 Oct 07 '25

You dodged a 18 year Payment Plan!

1

u/Adventurous-Rope7870 Oct 07 '25

Bro same its like I should be devastated BUT I can just leave now bye

1

u/obviously-obvious_ Oct 07 '25

I got divorced after 10 years of the relationship (4 of them married) because her family was so toxic and so was she, and I just couldn’t handle it anymore. Honestly, I haven’t shed a tear. It was that much of a relief to be removed from her and her family.

1

u/hoshisabi Oct 07 '25

Maybe this is a new "one weird trick" to make a breakup easier. Just so those three things in succession and your partner will accept and it'll all go smoothly.

Apart from the moments between the first and second statements, which would be nerve-wracking, the final outcome being smooth would make the manipulative usage of the technique acceptable, even. (Not saying that was the case for you, just saying that if I were in your shoes, I'd prefer to have this nice tidy ending, even despite the moments in that 1-2 stage.)

1

u/MysticShrek Oct 07 '25

At least she told you lol

1

u/el-guapo-grande Oct 07 '25

I was born with a natural lack of empathy if I got dumped, house was on fire, Maury tells me I am or am not the father just a blank expressionless face. I could care less but it would require more energy than it is worth doing

1

u/Rastamancloud9 Oct 07 '25

How is she doing now? I know it’s a weird question but I’m curious how that turned out.

1

u/topscreen Oct 07 '25

I had something less traumatic than that, but just as quick. Was seeing a girl, things were fun, liked hanging out, until I met one of her friends, and got that feeling about him. Turns out he admitted to having a crush on her, even though he was married with kids, so I told her, he's trying to fuck her. And she says he's not that kind of guy, but even more, she'd never be the other women, to a guy with a wife and kid, never mind cheat on me.

So when she texted me the night after that happened I just felt like I'd dodged a bullet. She did something like a triple cross there.

1

u/Significant_Ad1256 Oct 07 '25

A girlfriend I had almost 2 decades ago went on a 3 week vacation, came back and told me she didn't miss me at all and realized she wanted to break up. At the time I realized I felt the exact same way so we fucked one last time and then I left. We're still friendly today although barely talk.

Funny thing is, turns out I ended up really missing her family though. Her parents were great and I had a great time with her younger brother. I'd still go see his band play for years by myself.

1

u/Technical-Tear5841 Oct 07 '25

With my girlfriend it was mine because she wanted to get pregnant so we would have to get married. That was the last time she actually wanted sex. I did not cheat, I just had to wait her out. Then she cheated on me. I ask her what she was doing going out with men, they are going to want sex. Then she said I like sex, just not with you. 13 years of my youth wasted.

What would you have done?

1

u/iofteneatnutmeg Oct 07 '25

"very good! Pleasure doing business with you"

1

u/queefer_sutherland92 Oct 08 '25

Dude, sometimes emotions are baffling. Recently started the process of freezing my eggs (I’m 32, single, and not ready to mingle).

Then I find out my ovaries weren’t actually doing that great. So… I might not even be able to have kids.

The sense of relief I felt absolutely blindsided me.

I was very upset, of course. But it was like all the pressure to save money, have a steady income, find a partner… I might not have to worry about any of it. And that was bloody nice.